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Gather round the campfire, kittens, because daddy is finishing up S6E5, "We've Got Magic To Do". If you remember our conversation from last week, we are wary but supportive of Lorelai's mission to "Let Luke Live" (LLL), we agree that children can be seen and also heard but if that little gremlin throws glitter on me, its ON SIGHT, and finally, Richard confronts The Truth about the Mitchem and the Huntzbergers, et al, and invites the news mogul to step outside for a round of fisticuffs, figuratively speaking...

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Well gang, for two people who confidently claimed they would not be discussing Heated Rivalry, we sure did spend 20 min discussing Heated Rivalry. Other than that, we've got the DAR, Rory invents digital marketing, Emily and Richard FINALY find out about the truth of Mitchum and the Huntsbergers, and Paris joins the proletariat. It'll be a regular old piperoo!

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The verdict is in and so is season six, episode one “New and Improved Lorelai” PART TWO. We sentence you all to lots of thoughts on Emily and Richard as the eternal scorpions, our finely honed legal theories, and perhaps too much discussion of bottled water? NAH! You’ll love it.

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We can rebuild her! We have the technology! It’s season six, episode one “New and Improved Lorelai.” Luke and Lorelai are locking it down, the town is getting weirdly hung up about proposal gender roles, Rory’s in the poolhouse, and we have a lot to say about every inch of it. Tune in next week for the thrilling conclusion to the courtroom drama we’ve all been demanding!

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Welp, this would have been posted the week of thanksgiving, if we had managed to edit it in time! Instead, please enjoy our pre-Turkey touchbase, where we discuss mostly the Predator franchise, Gabby's disturbing boner for same, and why we are so disturbed by the injustice of Emily Gilmore's behavior. 

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Human kindness is overflowing and so are our hottest of takes as we wrap up season five, episode twentytwo A House Is Not a Home. We go on tour, move into the pool house, and pop the question. What more could the next season possibly hold?? Tune IN to find OUT.

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Well gosh, things sure are moving along at a clip as we wrap up season 5 with episode 22, A House Is Not A Home. Here in part 1 we cover The intervening ~4 episodes since we last spoke, play a little catch up, and set up our scenario: precious Rory is in THE SLAMMER? For stealing a YACHT. So like that's a whoole thing! 

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We weren't able to return to Stars Hollow this week, what with all the Halloween festivities. Join us for a little post-halloween touchbase where we discuss costumes of yore, body doubling, and Weapons.

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Put on your thinking caps and behold the illuminated Boob Tube cause we’re writing our thesis on 2024’s I Saw the TV Glow. We have too many thoughts, quite a few feelings, and a Buffy history to unpack. So join us in the midnight realm to download our takes via psychic connection. Content warning for discussions of suicide and the “bury your gays” trope.

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And we're back! The thrilling conclusion to last week's part 1, we praise Rory for her self control shown in not being a totally devious slutbag like we were at her age, but end up advising her to slut it up to the full extent of the law, anyway. Can't teach a couple old dogs new tricks!

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Whoomp, there it is - a couple of silver tongued devils have slipped into your podfeeds with Season 5, Episode 17, Pulp Friction Part 1. We’re listening to some voicemails, we’re stealing cocoa puffs from the cafeteria, at one point Zoe suggests you either LOVE or LEAVE Connecticut which is funny since she plans on doing neither! Join us!

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Call us Barbra Streisand cause we are looking back fondly on The Way We Were before we experienced the trauma of season 5, episode 14 “Say Something” part two. We’re not usually in a limo but we are always team Lorelai, concerned about parent / child relationships, and yearning for Luke so at least that remains consistent. We invite you to put the stolen answering machine tape this episode is recorded on in your Walkman and enjoy!

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Did someone order an ugly cry with a side of breakup PTSD? GREAT. Because this is Gilmore Girls season 5 episode 14 “Say Something” pain I MEAN part one. Gabby is back from the moors but up to her gills in Musinex and the vapors PLUS Zoe is burnt out? AND it’s a devastating lost weekend of an episode? Let’s ride!

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It had to be you. We wandered around and finally found somebody who…wanted to heart S5E13 Wedding Bell Blues, Part 2. 

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It’s more than a drama, it’s more than a musical, it’s a totally new form of podcasting as we cover Gilmore Girls season 5 episode 13 Wedding Bell Blues AKA Cop Rock Cock Block. Richard and Emily are two nuclear missiles headed for vow renewal bliss and we’re riding those rockets like the end of Doctor Strangelove as we talk manners, class consciousness, and penis shaped pasta. Best WISHES to your ears.

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Well folks, you've asked and we've delivered - a Labor Day Special if ever there was one, here's our dissection of a foundational text of the teen film oeuvre, Cruel Intentions (1999). Let's dig deep into the seedy underbelly of hypothetical late '90s New York High Society and get at the still-beating heart of what made this movie great: watching it when you're under 20 years old. 

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Ring ring - your humble hosts are at the door with cookies, tequila, and TAKES for Gilmore Girls season 5 episode 11 “Women of Questionable Morals” PART TWO. Stick with us as we lose a dog, gain an ice skating rink, and hear from our intrepid reporter on the streets Molly to help us with things like “the plot” and “what happened?” 

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Moderately rated and moderately weighted, your buds at Boob Tube are back with Gilmore Girls season 5 episode 11 “Women of Questionable Morals” PART ONE. Join us as we reorient ourselves in the arc of Chris’s terrible parenting, stop being polite and start getting real about snow, and instantly endorse the trifecta of Emily and Richard and a dog. Catch you hot muttons next time!

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 Well lovebirds, about 15 solid minutes of BookTok up top, then Paris and Boyle (Doyle?) smash, and elsewhere, its Lukes Dark Day and Lorelai can’t help but get involved in Season 5, Episode 10, But Not As Cute As Pushkin - Part 2

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Good morning, students! It is with suitable excitement that I announce that as the matriculating class of 2025, we will be touring the campus of Season 5, Episode 10, But Not As Cute As Pushkin. More class interrupting shenanigans from Logan, a wayward Yale potential from Chilton is delighted to get more than she bargained for during this hairbrained college experience with Rory, Paris and Logan.

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You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here (LIZ AND T.J.) because “The Party’s Over” part TWO. Rory’s joining the lost boys, Luke and Lorelai cannot get even a night off from familial chaos, and Lane finds out the call is coming from inside the French fries. 

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Gather round wild pigs of filth and hear tell of the beginning of the end with season 5, episode 8 “The Party’s Over” PART ONE. Zack learns of his fate in the sludge with Satan’s devil dogs, Rory agrees to attend a grandparent party that is TOTALLY on the up and up, and Lorelai and Luke make the mistake of thinking they can have a romantic evening of Mountie themed role play in peace. FOOLS. 

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We’re back with the second half of Practical Magic I MEAN Gilmore Girls season 5, episode 7 ”You Jump, I Jump, Jack.” We simply must unpack a first kiss next to a sleeping butt, the Discreet Charm of the not-so-Bourgeoisie, and a terrifying round of golf. In Omnia Paratus!

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Iceberg, right ahead! We’re aiming our unsinkable ship at the first half of season 5, episode 7 “You Jump, I Jump, Jack.” Join us in the wheelhouse to track GG’s various ships - some newly christened and some hitting stormy seas. Also… 9/11???

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We’re chewing the fat and cutting the cheese with our very off the cuff Secret Lives of Mormon Wives season 2 takes AND MORE. We’ll meet you next week in our shared, escalating hellscape with another seminal Gilmore Girls episode. 

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We are finally consummating season five, episode three and this big bang will be “Written in the Stars” (part 2)! We’ll hit up the town hall referendum on local business owners bumping uglies, the wake of an elderly lover, and end up back in… Dean’s bed of sin??? 

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We are pants OFF and hair SPIKED for season five, episode three “Written in the Stars” part one! Your hosts are in an agony of titillation as Lorelai and Luke flirt their way into their first real date and Gabby has an uncomfortable and frankly irredeemable reaction to the introduction of Logan. Join us next week for the culmination of so. Many. Things.

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LISTEN UP 5’s, A 9 IS SPEAKING: Enneagram Boner Ep

Gang, we need to talk about Enneagrams on main. Gather round as we discuss our types and generally shoot the poop about whatever's on our darling little minds. We’ll be back anon with an electrifying return to Gilmore Girls season 5!

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Throw your hockey stick out the window and bring in the marching band cause we’re wrapping up the second episode of season five with “A Messenger, Nothing More” part 2! Get ready for Supernatural cul-de-sacs, roast beef franchise fantasies, electric sensuality, and so much more.

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Just call us The Blur because we are STEAMING through the Gilmore Girls canon and blasting our way into season 5, episode 2 “A Messenger, Nothing More” part 1! We catch up with Luke supporting ye olde deadbeats, Lorelai channeling her daughter drama and blue balls into frantic overwork, Rory processing in Italy, and Lane soaring so high that we fear she can only fall. Will Zack snare her heart by being aggressively awful? Is this the episode where we finally see some Luke and Lorelai P-in-V? Tune in next week for part...

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We’re back baby with the thrilling conclusion of our season 5 premiere coverage. Beefs are roasted, Baptists are bumped, and both our gals head into the summer geographically removed from the objects of their affection. See you next time for (hopefully) a 35 minute HD consummation scene on a table with Luke and Lorelai.

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The people demanded it and we’re here to deliver - even more Dean and Rory pillow talk and lovemaking in our season five premiere! We’re asking the tough questions: how exactly would you get gummy bears into brownies? Do old money richie riches have Paul Blart Mall Cops guarding their mansions? And is the mystery of who chewed Taylor’s shoe the biggest enigma in true crime history? It sure is to Gabby!

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We hope you are ready for a very confusing boner with PART DEUX of our “Raincoats and Recipes” coverage. Luke and Lorelai? Thrilling! Erotic! Jason? AN AFFRONT TO THE SENSES! Dean and Rory? Uh oh!!! Naked Kirk? A delight. Season four? Over and out. 

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Grab a door and throw on your complementary robe for season four, episode 22 “Raincoats and Recipes.” The Dragonfly Inn and our legs are both OPEN FOR BUSINESS as Luke and Lorelai’s romance ascends to new heights. Nothing else could possibly happen in this episode, right? ...Right?

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We interrupt this broadcast to bring you our renewed thoughts on what's truly important in life: TLC Reality programming banger SISTER WIVES. We’ve said a lot and yet nothing at all so we had to go back to the scene of the crime for another Sister Wives Special Episode. Are we now Robin apologists? MAYBE. Would we still die for Janelle? OF COURSE. So grab some horrific decor, log on to the manosphere, and join us for a very intimate marriage.

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Tights? On. Fights? Imminent. With the exception of the 10 minute conversation at the top of the show about “cat” people and “dog” people, a few audio snafus and a perplexing about-face by Jess in the final quarter, we are all systems go on season 4 episode 21 “Last Week Fights, This Week Tights” PART 2. 

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It’s the wedding-eth of the century-eth and your hosts are seated (eth) for season 4 episode 21 “Last Week Fights, This Week Tights” PART 1-eth. We’re loving Jess (???), meeting a new boy who will NOT matter, and contemplating a horse in your place of business. So RSYP to our episode and make a date with next week for part 2!

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Grab a paperback and head for the local strip club cause we’re mud wrestling our way through “Luke Can See Her Face” part deux. We are making a shocking and full throated defence of Jess plus talkin zucchini, self-help, and more. So RSVP your ears to our voices, won’t you?

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Close your eyes and think of Miss Patty cause we’re visualizing Gilmore Girls season 4 episode 20 “Luke Can See Her Face” - FART 1! We continue to wax poetical about the gorgeous voice notes y’all have been submitting and get caught up with coincidentally single Luke and Lorelai. So grab your cats, throw on a blue bathrobe, and pop the cassette tape of our podcast into the boombox of your hearts. 

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What's that, you say? Can't get enough of Cousin Maryland and her whacky back-from-the-dead hijinx? Why, have we got a treat for you. We're tackling the tail end of S4E16 The Reigning Lorelai - we're monologuing in a PantieLand, we're smoking cigarettes indoors in our grief Kimono, and we're thanking Pennilynn Lott JUST for being Pennilynn Lott.

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Pass the championship belt because we are burying a crone and christening a new matriarch in season four, episode 16 “The Reigning Lorelai” - part one! Join your humble hosts as we stop yammering for once to listen to your mellifluous voice notes and pay our respects at the passing of TWO elderly rich women with preposterous nicknames. Sweetie and Trix? This one goes out to you!

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Take a break from your regularly scheduled programming to compare and contrast our Boob Tube roster. Inside you there are two wolves, they are both WB shows, and we have a lot to say about all of it. Full episode and video on Patreon later this week!

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One little voice keeps calling me calling me in tonight's episode, season 4 episode 14, “The Incredible Sinking Lorelais” parte deux. Truth is, we love the huge boyfriend, Lane ultimately does need to go, its time to CUT! THAT! CLASS! for real for real, we kill Lorelai the First (mostly for fiscal reasons) and Jason the Partner (mostly for personal reasons). High ho silver, away!

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Paging the unsinkable Molly Brown cause we’re gonna need an assist for season four, episode 14 “The Incredible Sinking Lorelais” PART ONE. Phone tag rages, money runs short, and academic woes loom in this stressful little morsel but your hosts manfully self-sooth through it!

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Raise the curtain and salute your shorts because we are hitting performance art paydirt in season 4, episode 7 “The Festival of Living Art” PART TWO. Join us for a master class in dramaturgy, elderly drummers, and tableau vivants. 

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Call us the Connecticut Arts Council cause we’re fully lezzed out for season 4, episode 7 “The Festival of Living Art” PART ONE. We’re going full Buff Otis on baby pagers, coupons, and more so strap in.

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Rory finally made it to the Ivy League in today's epic, season 4 episode 2, The Lorelais' First Day at Yale, and we are ready to Big League Chew THE FAT about it all. Worried we won’t be decrying the college mattress realism for the second episode in a row? Never fear, we have receipts! Proof! Timelines! And we can’t wait to share every last second of it with you 😻 

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Happy New Year and Happy season 4! Your humble hosts are back in action, as well as your humble...er characters, Rory and Lorelai, fresh off the boat from their european adventures. In "Ballrooms and Biscotti", our heroines complain far less than we were prepared for, Zoe finds the Souvenir Obligation to be stressful, and we continue to speculate wildly on easily googable future plot points surrounding Rory's hypothetical Dark Turn. Hold on to your hats, Tubers, its a new year, same old us!

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If there’s anything your humbly hosties love it’s recording a whole ep tip to tail and definitely not losing half our audio and doing an emergency rerecord. And it is with that intrepid spirit that we wrap up season three and march bravely toward 2025, Yale, a new inn, and season four 🫡 

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Get ready to reenact the NSYNC Bye Bye Bye music video cause this is season three, episode 22 “Those Are Strings, Pinocchio” PART 1. We marvel at what we’ve missed (WHY is Dean getting married??) and brace for what’s to come aka strategically deployed wolves and a graduation heard round the world!

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Hold hands and stare into the ashes of our dreams with us in “A Tale of Poes and Fire” PART DEUX. So take to your bed like Paris in a moment of existential crisis and let us be the sock puppet theater you deserve. 

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The world seems more on fire than usual so please accept our contribution: season three, episode 17 “A Tale of Poes and Fire.” Keep the home fires burning and we’ll see you in the morning

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This Halloween you might be asking yourself - whatever happened to Baby Boob Tube? Well don’t you fret because we’ve Written a Letter to Daddy with season three, episode thirteen “Dear Emily and Richard.” This episode brings us lots of answers but in some ways we have more questions than ever. So throw on your hospital gown, grab an Epilady, and let us impregnate your ears!

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As Zoe wraps up her international constitutional and Gabby gets her spooky lil head on straight, we're taking a brief break from Gilmore Girls this week to talk Battlestar Galactica. We will be back next will with Lorelai and Rory, but for now, enjoy this brief jaunt to space!

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Just a little shortie this week as we wrap up this litigious parable. Neither Lorelai nor Emily know anything about the other, still, and its season 3! When will they learn?? The deposition is in and Emily is steamed, Lorelai is going on a cute coffee date with Deputy Daddy from Twilight, pre-stache, and we do not I repeat do not support either dog abuse NOR harmful racist tropes spewed by ol' Felonious Whats-His-Guts. 

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En garde! It's season 3, episode 11, "I Solemnly Swear", and in this part 1, we're setting up backstabbing, abandoned parking garages, and a fencing lesson simply dripping with earnest lesbionic overtones. Say no more! We'll suit up and meet you on the piste!

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We are finally finishing our turkey day leftovers with “A Deep-Fried Korean Thanksgiving” PART  2. Do we still get sidetracked by aprox one million tangents? Sure! But by god we made it through a measly half an ep with all the aplomb of our gals chomping their way through four full dinners. Bring on the rolls!

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Your hosts are reporting live from August re the turkey time shenanigans of our Gilmore Gals in season three, episode 9 “A Deep-Fried Korean Thanksgiving.” We’ve got a LOT to say and I can’t claim we get very far into the (tofurkey) meat of this ep before we break for part deux. But join us for introspections on Battlestar Galactica, why our emotional reactions to GG are so fraught, and our Jess feels. To paraphrase Sonia Morgan “There’s nothing gray about OUR gardens.”

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The night wears on, Tubers, and these dogs? Are barking. We’re wrapping up “They Shoot Gilmores, Don’t they?”, noting Jackson’s predisposition to hysteria and fleeing of the scene, Dave’s quick thinking seduction, and the Big Breakup we’ve all been waiting for. Join us as we commence “trying” for 4 in 4! Fingers crossed its twins!!!

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Gabby and Zoe reunite (briefly) with reality before diving back into the summer haze, pausing to discuss Season 3, Episode 7, They Shoot Gilmores, Don't They? Lorelai and Luke set the scene of a town all abuzz with excitement about the annual dance competition. Much chit chat, discussion of Jess Vs Paris, and the devastating synopsis of Boxing Helena (1993) which will change how you view our humble reality as we know it. Put on your dancin' shoes, girls and/or gays, its a long night ahead!

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We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming for an AB BREAK! AKA a mini-sode in which we invite you to contemplate our six pack abs as we talk Bridgerton and assorted horror movies. Leo season is LOADED but we’ll be bringing all the content to you we can muster during these sweet summer months.

Stay ripped boob tube nation and we’ll meet you at Luke’s as soon as our rigorous Chilton schedule permits.

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Grab a chair, Tubers, because we're putting on a parentification clinic this week, which is easy to do with this show! Wrapping up S3E6 with the much-discussed protest, one mercilessly be-eggled vehicle, outrage on Jess’ behalf for once, and a recently roughed up bathroom. You’re gonna wanna stand upwind of this funky clunky hunk a junky, that much is for damn sure!

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Motherhood is in full bloom in this weeks episode, Season 3 Episode 6 Take the Deviled Eggs! Our intrepid hosts deliver hot takes on Sherry's Baby Shower, Patty's new Latin Lover, and the details of the shared Stars Hollow Place of Worship, among other things. May we suggest you get on your knees and take a of whiff of this diaper! 

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Ella Fitzgerald isn’t the only one struggling to get this show on the road in the GG season two finale “I Can’t Get Started.” Your easily sidetracked hosts finally get their head in the game to talk Sookie’s wedding prep, how we’re voting in the upcoming election (Chilton student body prez, natch), and the Gilmore family’s enduring commitment to verbally abusing medical professionals. 

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Ella Fitzgerald isn’t the only one struggling to get this show on the road in the GG season two finale “I Can’t Get Started.” Your easily sidetracked hosts finally get their head in the game to talk Sookie’s wedding prep, how we’re voting in the upcoming election (Chilton student body prez, natch), and the Gilmore family’s enduring commitment to verbally abusing medical professionals. 

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Get on the stinky bus of disappointment, Gus, because the Boob Tube Express is boarding now! We’re finishing off S2E21 Lorelai’s Graduation day with a hot n fresh part 2, where we get ANGRY angry at the rich, learn about the importance of arriving at prom a full two hours early, and hold Rory’s hand through having her first Chaotic Crush. ALL ABOARD!

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Grab a mortarboard and get to motorboating cause we’re receiving our associate’s degree in season two, episode 21 “Lorelai’s Graduation Day.” We major in being thrilled to see Lorelai get her flowers and minor in hoping her parents don’t eff it all up and pondering the pining betwixt Rory and Jess. Unless you feed lead to our jumping frog, will see you again next week for the THRILLING conclusion.

NOTE: We forgot to take our mid-roll break, so Part 1 ends rather abruptly. DEEPEST apologies, dear listene...

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We are SEATED for a film by kirk in season two, episode nineteen, part DEUX. Join us for a forensic investigation of the circumstances of this car crash, continued despair at the state of affairs re Jess, and of course laser sharp focus on the coded communiques between Miss Patty and Babette. Let’s eat!

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We are BACK BABY and, like Jess, we refuse to learn a goddamn thing in season two, episode nineteen “Teach Me Tonight.” We’re starting strong with hardline takes on the education system, pleas for reasonable communication, and raging against the sexism of making a high achieving girl mommy a bad boy who refuses to do school. You know, the fun stuff! Join us next week as we crash into the conclusion of this episode and take in a truly life changing piece of Cinema.

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Happy Early Mother’s Day, Tubers! This week’s very special episode features Zoe’s own actual, literal Mother, Beverly, live in the Boob Tube recording studios and answering pressing questions about motherhood, rearing children, and The Gilmore Girls. Huge shout out to the mothers and guardians that make the horrifying task of growing up just a little bit easier, we see you, we love you, we’re sorry about the sleep deprivation, thanks for everything you do and are

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Fetch the smelling salts because you’re humble hosts have been laid LOW by the disrespect to alone time in season two, episode sixteen “There’s the Rub.” We’ve got takes, takedowns, and tee hee hee hees and that’s just about Rory’s takeout order! So tune in for the full run (rub) down NOW.

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Let the wild rumpus start with part 2 of our Bracebridge Dinner breakdown! We are feasting our eyes on wigs, marital strife, horses’ heinies, and so much more.

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Listeners, lock up your peacocks that you don’t want ending up in pies cause we’re in part one of our season one, episode ten The Bracebridge Dinner era. We use this build up to a feast to dream up potential new merch, try to fathom Gabby’s insistence that the whole episode is painfully erotic, and generally get horned up for the dinner theater to come. You won’t want to miss THESE thirty pounds of aged beef!

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Ok pledges, this opportunity for hazing before you rush Delta Boob Tube takes place in Emily Gilmore’s BBQ pit ‘n’ Smokery, where we shall discuss how we’re going to get Fully Puffed This Year Even If It KILLS us. There’s a little strife but Rory finds her Introvert Pal in the end (Gracie from The Nanny??) and no chapters go unread. Huzzah! Now, raise your right hands, and join us in reciting The Puff Pledge: I pledge myself to the Puffs, loyal I'll always be, a P to start...

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Thank your lucky stars that you don’t have to talk to another human bean at lunch today because your discman is humming with our takes on season two, episode seven “Like Mother, Like Daughter.” In part one we defend the American teenager’s right to be anti-social, get our first glimpse of a puff, and brace ourselves for FASHION.

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Gather up your petticoats, fellow Daughters of the American Revolution, because these Gilmore Gals are bustin' out all over! Its time for Rory to Come Out for Real, cotillion-styles. Bow ties are tied, books are balanced atop heads, we talk blue red lipstick vs orange red lipstick, (hey there, CosmoGal, never say this show doesn't have a value-add!)and of course no high stakes evening of finery would be complete with out some top choice, grade-a, farm-to-table tantrums. 

Join us for the thrilling conclusion to last weeks e...

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Rory is coming out and yet Paris is nowhere to be seen in season two, episode six “Presenting Lorelai Gilmore” PART ONE. We are edging it out on this one so enjoy the agony and the ecstasy of Chris returning, Gilmore marital strife, and preparing the young lady and her escort for the ball. Then tune in next week for the THRILLING FAN DANCE CONCLUSION. 

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To paraphrase Carol Anne Freeling, “He’s heeeeeere.” Yes, Jess is upon us in season two, episode five “Nick & Nora/Sid & Nancy”. As you can probably guess, Zoe and Gabby love his bad boy disregard for manners, non-smoking spaces, and book ownership. NOT. 

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And just like that, the wedding is OFF and our girls are ON the road in season one, episode four “The Road Trip to Harvard.” In a new and exciting twist we have a lot of Boston / New England thoughts. We also talk about the war on B&B’s, Lorelai’s mental health, and the logistics of wedding plan cancelations. Goodbye Max, we barely knew, liked, or remember you 🥲

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We’re talking about a soon to be married lady ON VALENTINES DAY to kick off season two with “Sadie Sadie.” Open your chrestomathies to page one and follow along with our hottest takes on matrimony, Dean’s plunging neckline, and Richard letting his evil flag fly. 

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This season finale has it all! A reunion, a proposal, and… troubadours? It is, in point of fact, season one, episode twenty one “Love, Daisies, and Troubadours.” We’re getting closure on Rachel (GAY) and the Rory and Dean separation and returning to a status quo with Paris on the enemies list. What will season two bring? Tune IN find OUT trouba DOUR.

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Rory’s struggle to say The L Word comes to the fore as she rages through season one, episode twenty “P.S. I Lo…” Will Emily smugly adopt Rory just to torment her daughter? Why does Lorelai have her hands BURIED in Luke’s belt loop region? DOES Kirk have asthma? Tune in 2 find out!!

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Time to throw on your most blinding white sneakers and start the baseball cap fashion show because we are down the rabbit hole with Emily in Wonderland. Rachel and Lorelei’s relationship continues to mystify and titillate us and we’re vaguely aware of Lane’s romantic shenanigans but the headline here is definitely our emotional Emily rollercoaster. Where do we land with this mad hatter and backside boys fan? Listen and learn! 

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Guess who’s coming to dinner? Thats right, its Lorelai: Original Flavor in the form of Trix, Emily’s nemesis and mother in law, she's coming to town and offering to advance Rory her quarter mill trust fund to help her pay for Chilton. Emily “Iago” Gilmore starts whispering in Lorelai’s ear, and its not long before the offer is rescinded. Ignore the Smaug’s horde of gilded Mother-In-Law gifts of old looming behind us, its time to get serious about your future!

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Gather up, Kiddos - time for your old pals Gabby and Zoe to gently wash away the stress of the holiday season with their warm, soapy tones. These two chuckleheads talk holiday specials, Rory Vs. Joey, and dreams for the new year amongst other chaotic off-the-cuff musings. Happy Holidays, Tubers. We love you more than Christmas Magic

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Ho ho UH OH we had a break DOWN in technology for season one, episode 17 the break UP: Part 2. Not sure what your humble hosts did to anger the audio gods but this is our second hiccup of the holiday season. So follow us down this trash filled alley of Rory repression and a Max reunion but be ready for the feral cat of Gabby’s audio going bye bye from approximately 58:00 - 10:10 and 1:20 - 1:26. Happy holidays to those who celebrate and happy wallow to all!

Duration: 01:37:12

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We’ve brought you a real treat today tubers - tragically not a meatball but a delightful to-go box filled with our thoughts on season one, episode sixteen “Star-Crossed Lovers and Other Strangers.” Rory and Dean are celebrating a three month anniversary with PAIN, Laurelei is dodging potential suitors, and your humble hosts are slangin unresearched mental health takes and star shaped hotdogs. So grab a founders day party punch and meet us by the bonfire for every precious drop!

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We mean it, it's for real this time Lor, cause this is season one, episode fifteen “Christopher Returns.” Shady’s back and he’s here to demand a bed for being an absent father, bathe in big business praise when he knows he is a human L, and brow beat Rory into keeping his financial secrets. NOT the daddy we signed up for. 

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Throw on your bumpit, squeeze into a pair of kitten heels, and encase something in Jell-o cause this is season one, episode 14 “That Damn Donna Reed.” Join our nuclear family as we track down a loose chick, a kitten, and what the heck the message of this episode re feminism is. Don’t forget to rate, review and heck join our patreon so we can afford to live in single earner traditional households!!

Now if you’ll excuse us, Gabby just had an impure thought about Zoe and...

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Get ready for a case of Bangle Balls because we’re talking season one, episode 13 “Concert Interruptus.” Of all the concert showcase tv eps we’ve watched, this is certainly the latest. But we still find oodles to say about the early 2000s fashions, crimes against friendship, and Luke’s fingerless gloves 👀

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Double your pleasure, double your fun, cause Zoe and Gabby are double teaming season one, episode twelve “Double Date.” We throw on our stethoscopes for a hot second to make some diagnoses, contemplate the mysteries of Todd (code name Tom), and yearn to step on Rune (code name Lune).

Want to double up on your enjoyment of this weird little dog and pony show of a podcast? Join our patreon! 

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We were certainly aflame for more of our favorite tightly wound sapphic queen bee but all we got was season one, episode eleven “Paris is Burning.” More potholes on the road of love for Lorelei and Max as the Gilmore Girls guide to GUYS rules are bent and broken, Sookie makes some romantic moves of her own, and we get just the most tantalizing second hand smoke from Paris and her parents’ divorce. We’re left in the ashes contemplating the mysteries of Parents’ Day and a possible detente between Gi...

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Put on your dancing shoes and grab a taco because we are cutting a rug with season one, episode nine “Rory’s Dance.” The title may be a dud but the ep delivers on foundational fights, young love, and mashed banana on toast. Stay gold Ponyboy!

Want to keep us in bananas and muscle relaxants? Join the patreon, rate, review, subscribe, do it all. 

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Scent the air and batten down the hatches Tube-heads cause we’re forecasting at least 10 inches of “Love and War and Snow.” We join a horned-up-for-snow Lorelei on the most whimsical date of our times and follow Rory through the labyrinth of family and friendship dysfunction. 

Want to get all the dirty dish on our friendship and various dysfunctions? Join the patreon! You also get piping hot friends-only insta stories once you give your IG screen name to Zoe

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Drape yourself in a feather boa and grab your guitar shaped purse because you’re headed to two, count em two, birthday blowouts in season one, episode six “Rory’s Birthday Parties.” We continue to be terrified of Emily’s emotional machinations, yearn sensually for that indigo Apple iBook, and deliver so much more with this bouncing baby of an episode.

Give yourself the gift of a Patreon subscription to see Gabby’s very special, very Leo birthday unboxing video.

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It’s our second day at Boob Tube school and Rory’s first day at Chilton in season one, episode two “The Lorelai's First Day at Chilton.” We’re just like Rory aka Lorelai Jr. aka Mary - finding our footing and trashing dioramas. Extra credit points for cowboy boots, DSL, and Al’s Pancake world.

Join us next time for Too Much Birthday and don’t forget to register for our seminar in silliness on Patreon. 

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WELCOME BACK, BOOB TUBERS! You’re joining this program already in progress: we have successfully landed in Stars Hollow and we are foaming at the mouth to tell you all about it, as well as these Girls we call Gilmore. Meet us at Luke's, we’ll be sitting at the counter, trolling for fresh meat - as per ushj - and we’ll split pot a’ the good stuff.

Welcome back once more, you hunks of burning love, we missed you like the dickens, now take my hand and...

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Somehow despite multiple potential endings, the actual end of our podcast really snuck up on us. We’re here to bid a fond farewell to an assortment of odds and ends characters and give this show one last lingering kiss goodnight (NOT goodbye). We also preview our brand spanking (emphasis on spanking) new show: Boob Tube. We really hope to see you there but either way thanks for letting us climb in your ear window every week for the past few years. Stay Speilburgian and Creep on comrades!

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