Relationships, Friendships and Family Dynamics

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We date with good intentions, believing that it will lead to positive outcomes and a bright future. We often willingly allow him to take the lead. Sometimes this leadership guides us toward something beautiful, but other times it leads us nowhere, resulting in years wasted on a path that was never truly ours.

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We are always told to look at potential. He's doing great things; he's going somewhere, as our elder would say. He's a good man, Savannah! Well, is that a great thing to do these days? 

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It’s more important than ever to have better friendships. As I get older, I realize how much I need real friends in my life—friends who genuinely care about the relationship through both the sad times and the happy ones. I want friends who will walk through the fire with me and also dance on the tables when life is good. And honestly, I’m tired of one-sided friendships—the kind where someone talks nonstop about themselves, then goes silent the moment I start to speak. You can tell they’re just waiting fo...

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There’s a growing trend today where many marriages resemble close friendships more than marriages. Couples are sleeping in separate bedrooms, but many aren't seeking a divorce. I would argue that it is often the husbands who are leading this trend of not fulfilling their roles as real partners. So, what is a wife to do?

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The best approach in any relationship is to be your authentic self. If someone chooses to end a relationship or friendship, it simply means the connection wasn’t right for you. It’s far worse to realize that someone is staying in your life only because of what you can offer them.

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This year, let's commit to our promises and resolutions. I know I will, and I'm going to be my own accountability partner. So, you be yours; it's easier because we all want the best for ourselves. So, let's do it!

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At events, the initial greeting often comes from whoever is closest or bold enough to approach—not necessarily someone who matches your vibe, intentions, or energy. Even if the energy feels right at first, don’t stop there; keep mingling. A positive first impression doesn't always indicate long-term compatibility. Sometimes, it's simply a matter of excitement, attention, or timing. 

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I wrote a "Dear Me" letter to myself, and I want to share a part of it. In this letter, I reflect on my journey of becoming who I am. This means I am embracing the direction life is taking me without second-guessing myself. I am following my first instincts about what I want in my life and in a partner. I encourage you to write a letter to yourself as well.

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I feel like it's becoming increasingly difficult to maintain friendships with the people we have known for a long time. While we understand that meeting new people can be challenging, we now find ourselves questioning our relationships within our own group.

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So many women are going through this; what makes it even sadder is that some stay for years or never leave. 

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I believe he had a wonderful time on the date, which raises questions about why he's not texting you regularly or returning your calls. I think it's important to date multiple people for this reason. So, let's discuss it!

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I want you and me to be very intentional about finding friends in the New Year. From here on out, we’re paying attention to how people make us feel, how they speak to us, and how they show up when it truly matters. We’re no longer entertaining friendships out of habit or history. We want connections that are mutual—where the support, the effort, and the energy go both ways. No more collecting friendships just because we crossed paths with someone. If she’s not aligned with who we are, we don’t ne...

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We have to be careful when letting new friends into our lives and into our friend groups. It’s just like dating — we don’t introduce a new guy to our friends and family right away. The same level of caution applies when we meet new friends. Take your time before letting them all the way in. It's very important to find out who they are, what their background is, etc. 

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I'm still going to post episodes and will continue to do all the things I have planned. I'm finally setting up my Pateron, all I need to do is add a few things. My Instagram is going to be more of a lifestyle page, showing you all the cool things about life living in Austin. I actually have a due date for my debut novel. A car accident isn't going to stop me. 

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Friendships can resemble a beehive—there’s always a queen bee at the center, her trusted henchmen nearby, and the rest of us forming the outer ring, guarding the hive and politely pretending we’re on board with everything.

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Ladies, we need to take a real look at what it means to be in a long-term relationship with no wedding proposal in sight. With the holidays approaching, I know many of you are wondering the same thing — will this finally be the year? I’m going to share a list of honest reasons that may help you understand whether a proposal is actually coming or not. 

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I believe this is worth contemplating. Who is the real winner in this scenario? What really happens to him when you're not there anymore?

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It was a listener’s question. I don’t think they were being mean-spirited; I think they were just concerned because my mom and Lulu aren’t here anymore.

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Holiday magic has a way of clouding our judgment. The twinkling lights, cozy nights, and festive excitement can make every connection feel deeper than it really is. But just because the season feels magical doesn't mean the person you're with is truly right for you. The real question is: how can you tell if he's genuinely a good match, or if you're just caught up in the holiday charm? 

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Some men don’t stop taking until you stop giving. As long as you keep showing up, he’ll keep using you. He’ll drain your last bit of dignity if you let him. He’ll drag your name you up and down the street if you let him. So don’t just say you’re done — show it. 

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Ladies, here’s what happens when you start to be the provider in your relationship. 

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The dating scene may appear to be declining, but this often happens when you lower your standards. Many men today expect women to be the providers while they benefit from the women's efforts and finances. Ladies, maintain your standards and stop entertaining men who offer nothing but excuses. Remember, you are not their safety net. 

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Ladies, stop trying to do everything on your own. If you really want to achieve your dreams and go farther in life, you need the right mate — someone loyal, who shares your goals and supports your journey. Life is always better when you have a partner by your side. Two is always better than one

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We’ve all fallen into this trap — opening up to the wrong people. But not everyone in your friend group is meant to hear your breakup story. Some friends carry their own hidden pain and will judge you through the lens of their secrets. I know you’re just looking for comfort and a soft place to land, but remember — not everyone’s heart has walked the same path as yours.

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We do this to ourselves because we focus on the good. He’s throwing red flags, but we choose to look past them. And that’s how the cycle begins — dating the same man over and over, just with a different name  Sometimes, we fall in love with potential instead of reality — and that potential can lead us straight down the rabbit hole.

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A quick life update. Sorry for going missing, but I’ve been on the road, headed to a new destination called home. I did it scared and overwhelmed, but I made it. The key is to just do it. We we will not know what life has in store for us unless we move, unless we take a chance on us. So, for that reason, I left on Monday at 4 p.m. to travel to my new home.  Of couree, I had to stop. I can't drive 15 hours straight. But I really stop to...

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There could be several reasons for this feeling, and we will explore them further in the next episode. But here are some factors that might contribute to a wife feeling this way. In the next episode, I will speak with some married friends to get their opinions and report back to you all.

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I never knew about this, and wanted to share it! 

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I have talked about this on the podcast before, and I think we need a refresher. One of the biggest decisions in life is choosing a partner. It sets the trajectory for our lives. But we have a habit of saying yes because he proposes. But really, are you ready to say yes? 

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How many times have we all seen this behavior? He starts to act indifferent, he’s not calling as much, the date nights slow down, he finds things to argue about, etc. This is the biggest telltale sign he has someone else on the brain. 

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I had a call with a listener which brought us to the discussion of that period in life when we are having the most difficult times. 

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We all follow the couples that look like the perfect match with the matching outfits, exotic vacations or just simply poses like the movie Mr. & Mrs. Smith. 

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I think most men feel very confident without a job because they have a woman providing for them, but ladies, this is where you need to pay attention. Supporting a partner through a rough season is one thing, but enabling him to stay stuck and depend on you is another. 

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I was scrolling on Instagram when I came across this conversation. I know this, but it was very exciting to hear, too. So I wanted to share it with you all. 

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Of course, he might want you to believe that what he’s saying is true—but we’re not buying it. When a guy says something like, “You’re not enough,” it’s rarely about you. More often than not, it’s about his own insecurities. 

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 I’ll be honest, I’ve been guilty of this, and I’m sure you have too—overthinking the negative. You know, those moments where your mind starts spinning out of control, replaying conversations, analyzing every little detail in your relationship, and before you know it, you’ve stressed yourself out over something that might not even be true. 

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Someone ask why am I smiling. How could I smile? Well, I know what grief can do. I've been down that road before when my sister passed. So, I'm choosing to heal differently. 

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I knew she was leaving months ago. I knew I would be alone in this world. So I started 9 months ago to build a new life to help the grieving process. 

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You all know how I feel about this topic. I've discussed the 50/50 approach in romantic relationships before, and I'm sure many of you have your own opinions. I know this because every time I cover this subject, I receive a lot of emails.

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The question is all over social media, being asked by some broke-looking guys. First of all, real men do not ask this question. But we have these little immature boys who we females don't give a second look at running with this question. The only thing I can think of is these busted guys never had attention, and somehow, they believe they have attention now. But really, not anyone is paying attention because I must admit the question didn't last long on social media before it was put to rest. So, let's give...

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Ladies, if you see this happening, please nip it in the bud, as the elders would say. Don’t ignore the early signs of role reversal that leave you carrying the weight while he gets comfortable watching you lead, provide, protect, and fix everything. 

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I have talked about this in previous episodes, but I like to do a refresher to remind you that even though you're in a relationship, I want you to continue the way you were before you met him. 

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Some men admire women who stand up for themselves; others don’t. A confident man respects her standards and sees her strength as a good thing. But an insecure man feels challenged by her. Deep down, he knows he can’t control her, and that frustrates him. He realizes that she won't allow him to treat her poorly—there will be no games, no lies, and no half-hearted efforts—because she refuses to tolerate his nonsense.

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We all know people who say, “This is just how I am,” and refuse to correct their behavior. But their actions — and even their facial expressions — clearly call for a change. They refuse to grow, insisting it's just their personality. Eventually, they get dumped and are left wondering what went wrong. 

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I have more male friends than female friends, and that's an advantage, particularly for us. I hear them saying things like, "Is she worth the effort?" or I hear them curse, "like, oh shit," when they find out she's in debt, or what I like to call "Paying Bills." 

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It starts small, as I mentioned in the previous podcast. But sometimes, it can get out of hand, and that’s when things get complicated. The more you try to be her, the more you lose your own sense of who you are—and that’s when resentment toward her begins to build. 

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It seems like harmless chatter. We are just talking about our husbands, wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, and partners. Plus, we are speaking with people we know, whom we consider family, friends, and colleagues. 

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It’s so easy to compare yourself to your friends — especially that one friend who you view as having it all together. Without even realizing it, you might start to become more like her, little by little, until you begin to lose sight of yourself. It just happens. But sometimes, if you're lucky, you catch yourself. And when you do, it's important to remember what brought the two of you together in the first place. Yes, it may have been your similarities — the things you shared and had in common — but more than that, I...

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We all experience loss at some point, but it's our responses to these outcomes that truly define us. It's what we choose to do afterward. We can choose to wallow in self-pity and blame ourselves, but that won't help us at all. 

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We come across them every day. Some of us even marry them, which makes us feel like fools! I wouldn’t want either, but I often wonder what the difference is. Is one better than the other? I doubt that’s possible. 

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In this review, I share my thoughts about why I left Houston. I will discuss my friendships, work experiences, issues of racism, and the feeling of being trapped in a city that I don't particularly like.

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I’m having a little chat fest on this episode, and I hope you enjoy it. 

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A listener asked about my techniques. I'm happy to share, and I hope you all share your healing experiences with me. It's all about learning from one another.

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I'm going to add a few more points here that I didn't mention in the podcast. While I only discussed the most powerful reason, which is also the most important, here are some additional benefits: It helps you regain your power, makes you stronger, and it affects your future.

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It’s still the beginning of a new year, and I’m evolving—growing in ways I didn’t fully expect. Lately, I’ve been discovering new things about my dating standards that I want to share. I have a feeling you might be going through something similar, maybe sensing a shift but not quite sure what it means, just like I was. At first, I didn’t fully understand what was happening either, but eventually, I realized the change and what was causing it. 

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Sometimes, ladies find themselves in sticky situations, such as being the lead in the relationship by becoming the main source of funds. Some say it happened so fast that they didn't realize it. I'm not judging, but let's discuss this mess or the reasons behind this mess. 

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In 2019, I decided to prioritize myself. It felt as though a switch had been flipped. I started putting myself first without hesitation. I changed my relationships with family, friends, and romantic relationships. It was the greatest gift I could have given to myself. 

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I'm tired of hearing that the dating scene has changed or it’s hard to date when you are older. Ladies, it only changes if you allow it to change in your world. Remember, anything in life only changes if you allow it to change for the negative or positive; it's up to you. 

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I received a question about my previous podcast. The person wanted me to clarify what I meant by "I would have stayed in my marriage if I had known Lulu was going to pass." 

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Lately, I have been asking the question that I have heard so many people ask, “How did I get here.” 

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I often hear women say, "I can change him. He will like me; I'm the one who can change him." But does he really need to be changed?

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So, I believe most of you think the pain comes from him being with another person. He stepped out of the relationship. But I beg the differ. It's about how the betrayal came about and how he did it. 

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I feel this is a conversation many people in relationships don't discuss or avoid. Maybe it's because some can't pinpoint the exact problem. But it's a big problem and needs to be addressed for many reasons. One reason is that this problem can determine whether or not you can reach your dreams and what you want out of your relationship. The other big reason is who wants to waste time to end up years later in a divorce? 

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I do believe it requires a commitment on both ends to move forward, but like with any other relationship, someone always lacks the ability to hold up their end. Or, it could be they don't want to. Maybe the injured party doesn't want to continue but feels they are being forced to because of the longevity of the friendship. 

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Talking to yourself isn’t a sign of craziness; I do it regularly, even in the dressing room. Verbalizing my thoughts helps me work through them and make sense of my decisions before discussing them with a friend or family member. Ultimately, I will be the final decision-maker. 

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This was the roadmap I created for myself. I wasn't sure if it would work, but surprisingly, it did. Divorce is scary because your life changes completely. I decided that I wanted my financial situation to remain the same, so I developed a path to success. I also knew I wanted to date—not just casually, but to truly embrace dating, just as I did before marriage. I can say it has worked out better than I thought! 

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Sometimes, ladies feel like they are comprising, but really, you are taking a backseat. The problem is that it's in our nature to be givers, and it's such a bad trait. Then we become upset, our health goes down the drain, and we don't know why. The problem is right there in front of us, but we start to blame our husbands. Yeah, he might have a little part in it, but we are the biggest problem. 

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This is a repeat episode from July 2nd. 

I've received many questions about an important topic: Should a woman share living expenses equally with her partner, or should she contribute more if she earns a higher income?

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Ladies, you have to stop using excuses for why he ignores you or doesn't acknowledge you on this important day. Please stop with that old saying, "He shows me 365 days out of the year," because you know that isn't true. It might be time for you to move on. Why stay if you aren't shown love on the biggest lover day of the year? 

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My personal journey over the last eight months of grief and heartbreak. It has been hard, and I haven't done what I could or thought I would do last year. But I'm not beating myself up over it. I did what I could, so that makes me not a failure but a success. 

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The last two years of a broken relationship are the most important. This is where the work begins. Yes, there is heartbreak, but it also leads to personal discovery.

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I see women whining about their recent breakups all the time, but I question if they truly understand what they're feeling and crying about. I don't think they know. It seems to me that women feel pressured to show some kind of emotion after a breakup. I know I can't be the only one who finds it somewhat laughable when a breakup occurs.

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Dating should be new and exciting, yet somehow, we tend to fall into the same old patterns. We often discuss the same topics in every relationship, the only difference being that it's with a different person. Honestly, this approach isn't working; we either end up breaking up or getting bored to death. So, let's switch up, do some things differently, try new questions, and see where things go. 

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The dating scene has changed so much, but I believe the reason many of us ended up back on it is that we didn't seek what we wanted in the beginning. We just went along with the first person who came along. So, with that, we weren't being fulfilled in many ways; our desires weren't being met. So here we are trying again, but this time, we will get it right. We are going to look out for ourselves first in what we want. No more going along because we talk ourselves out...

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What is a Gossipp Buddy? I bet you all have one. Let's stop putting a bad name on gossip; It’s not all bad.
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I believe the downfall of any relationship, whether romantic or platonic, occurs when one person becomes a carbon copy of the other. I think relying on someone else to make you happy and fill all the voids in your life can create too much pressure for anyone. Additionally, dating just one person can be a waste of time.
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The wedding season is here, and your friends who got engaged over the holidays are diving into wedding planning. She invites you to the wedding party, a gesture of trust and celebration. However, as her excitement grows, so does the list of expenses she's counting on you to cover, blurring the lines between shared joy and whose wedding is this.
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Many friendships end because you weren't being your true self; instead, you were trying to be what your friend wanted you to be. You were being her and doing the things she liked. When you attempted to express your own preferences or assert your individuality, conflicts arose. As a result, there was no space for your personal growth, yet despite all of this, you still find yourself missing her. But why is that?
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It's fun and exciting to walk into a room and have all the men's eyes on you. It reflects that you are exciting, mysterious, and intriguing. However, when it doesn't happen, we start to wonder why. So, what could be the reason?
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I wanted to talk about the fires because I saw a few single women or more gathering their belongings in a rush, trying to escape harm's way alone. 
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I don't know who came up with the saying about taking the easy way out; there is no such thing. Anytime an ending is presented in a relationship, there will be pain. 
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I want you to consider yourself your first and only priority. It should have always been that way. A lot of the problems we endure are because we put ourselves last. If you change that by embracing self-love—I mean really embracing self-love—we can be not only our best selves but also attract the people who align with us.
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Let's explore the main reason why some men place their significant others on hold. It's never a time that the main reason isn't involved. It would be nice or better if the case were depression or working hard at work, but oftentimes, it is because of the main reason and nothing else.
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Hi Ladies, we need to return to how we used to date. Some of you are creating a whole life with him in your mind before the first date. It's time to relax and look at this as a date, and nothing more.
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A viewer responded to my previous podcast. She wanted to know why I say leave a friendship if it's not fulfilling. I explained to her that we should all leave friendships that do not reciprocate.
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It's time to build meaningful friendships in 2025 and surround ourselves with friends who uplift and inspire us to grow positively. By holding ourselves and others accountable, we can develop relationships that truly enhance our lives. Let's eliminate fair-weather friendships that are only present because they seek what we can provide or are simply around because they are uninteresting and no one else wants to engage with them.
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There are so many faces and forms of love that it's impossible to have just one soulmate. Believing in only one soulmate limits you and suggests that fulfillment comes from one source, one person, when in reality, love is all around us. 
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Sometimes, when someone gives us a pass, we don't learn from it. We continue until the day they break our hearts. 
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I have discussed my experience in detail in another podcast. Please go listen to that podcast because it was shocking, weird, and funny. I think it was in last season's podcast. 
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I have never been someone who easily forgives or forgets. So, I guess I had to make a choice, and I chose not to forgive or forget. But I will tell you in the episode why I feel this way. I think it's a valid reason.
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Hey ladies! Many of you may be investing too quickly in your relationships. Let's take a step back and allow the guy to take the lead in investing and trying to impress you. So what I'm saying is to close your pocketbooks—yes, your pocketbooks.
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We can go back and forth with ourselves whether we should say something or not. I could say it's up to the individual. But I'm pretty sure the answer would be universal. 
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The greatest gift you can give a friend is to be there for them during their time of need, especially if it's a breakup during the holidays.  
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But we will bring solo traveling with us in the New Year. This approach allows for true freedom; we can fully embrace our desires without the need to compromise on daily activities with a friend. Plus, think about it: How many times have you had to forget what you wanted to do because your friend took up most of the day with her mess? 
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How many other people does he call his baby? Have you ever felt like you were his Launch Pad? Have you ever moved in with a guy and paid half of everything? 
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The initial stages of a husband's affair often involve you, and more than likely, you remain entangled in the situation. However, as the affair progresses, in the 3rd act, you would be booted out. Your husband no longer needs you, and that's where the lack of communication comes in, sleeping on the far end of the bed, not coming home after work, and Saturdays becoming workdays at the office. This is where most women start to snoop. But I will give you a few nonverbal cues that will help you in the beginning...

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Many women believe it's harmless, and it may seem that way at first. However, there's a clear hidden agenda behind his actions. What other reason could he possibly have for doing it?
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